Recreate Your Marriage in 12 Weeks with Resilient Entrepreneur and Therapist Dovid Feldman
Episode Details
Transcript
If you've ever felt overwhelmed by setbacks or questioned your ability to succeed, this episode will inspire you to tap into the power of resilience and discover a path toward personal growth and fulfillment. In this episode, we explore the transformative power of resilience and how it can help you overcome setbacks and self-doubt. Many individuals face challenges and doubts on their journey to success, but you are not alone in this struggle. A positive experience was also shared by Jamie, as he and his wife had worked with Dovid last year. Join us as we delve into the inspiring story of Dovid Feldman, a remarkable figure in marriage therapy and a true beacon of resilience.
In this episode, you will be able to:
- Contact Dovid Feldman for couples counseling.
- Find a balance between pursuing your dreams and ensuring financial stability in a constantly fluctuating economy.
- Be motivated by the power of resilience as a catalyst for turning around failures into stepping stones towards success.
- Immerse yourself in the vibrant realm of entrepreneurship – a world where growth and innovative shifts are the norm.
- Discover the lesser-known drawbacks of swapping time for money and how entrepreneurship could offer a beneficial alternative.
- Realize the true importance of agility in seizing potential opportunities in the entrepreneurial landscape.
Let’s get to know Dovid Feldman, a remarkable figure in marriage therapy and a beacon of resilience. For Dovid, the journey toward success wasn't a traditional one. He initially pursued music, dabbled in multilevel marketing, and even substitute teaching, only to realize his true passion lay in relationships. Now, he’s a reputable marriage therapist powered with his personal conviction that every marriage has the potential for greatness. With his unique experiences, Dovid brings an unparalleled perspective to the table, instilling hope and resilience in those he serves.
Books and Resources
52 Tweets To A Great Marriage: Your Guide to Long-Lasting Love and Intimacy
No More Mr. Nice Guy: A Proven Plan for Getting What You Want in Love, Sex, and Life
Connect with Dovid Feldman:
WEBSITE: https://dovidfeldman.com/
EMAIL: dovidfeldman@gmail.com
FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/netzachfamily
TWITTER: https://twitter.com/dovidfeldman
PODCAST: The Impassioned Marriage Podcast
Haven Financial:
https://www.myfinancialhaven.com/jamiebateman/
ATTENTION:
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Connect with Jamie
BOOK:From Adversity to Abundance: Inspiring Stories of Mental, Physical, and Financial Transformation
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Speaker 2
00:00
This episode is for any serial entrepreneur out there as well as anyone who is married and wants to work on their marriage. David, Feldman is a fantastic person to talk to is just a fantastic person. In general. He's a very kind soul, very wise person who has a lot of entrepreneurial experience and has experienced a lot of ups and downs with. Guard to personal challenges, and we talked about how he someone stole 500 thousand dollars from him, which was not easy to overcome for sure, and we speak about different entrepreneurial Ventures. He's had over the years, how he was making a ton of money back in the day and how you essentially had the golden handcuffs, and we talked about how he's evolved as a person and As a business owner and talked about his approach to marriage counseling, which is his has been his Focus for the last 12 years or so, in the interest of disclosure my wife and I have worked with David and I have just only very positive things to say about him and his approach to his. Marital counseling program. And you know, it's he and his wife do it together. He's the primary part of the, the business, I believe. But she also helps him out and has a different approach to working with the wives in the, in the marriage. But this, this episode is great. He's, he knows how to tell a story for sure and also knows how to do the rapid fire questions and just there's so much value here. In the end every minute I feel like there's just a lot of value that you're going to get in this episode for sure. So not one. You're going to want to miss enjoy. Welcome to the, from adversity, to abundance podcast. Are you an entrepreneur or aspiring entrepreneur? Then this show is for you. Each week, we bring you in Paxil stories of real people who have overcome painful human adversity to Create a life of abundance. You are not alone in your struggle, join us, and you will experience the power of true stories and gain practical Knowledge, from Founders, who have turned poverty into prosperity and weakness in to weld. This podcast will encourage you through your health relationship and financial challenges, so you can become the hero in your quest for freedom, take ownership of the life, you are destined to live. Live turn your adversity into abundance. Welcome everybody, to another episode of the, from adversity, to abundance podcast. I am your host Jamie Bateman. And today, I am thrilled to have with us, David, Feldman of building. Great marriages. David, how are you doing today? Hey, Jamie, it's great to see you terrific. Thank you. It's great to see you again, David, you know, we obviously know each other a little bit obvious to you and me, but not obvious to The Listener will maybe, touch on that later, but you and I do know each other but for the They're out there who does not know who you are. Who are you today? And what are you up to? Sure? Sure. So.
Speaker 1
03:37
Today changes all the time. I am a husband. Father of six, beautiful children. And I am a marriage therapist. I am licensed here in the state of Illinois. I work with couples primarily. Also, with individuals and my primary focus is based off of my personal conviction that everybody can have a great marriage. Ridge. And that everyone can do what it takes to be a good marriage partner and have a safe and healthy family, a great relationship. And one of my lifes missions is to help people get to that place and for them to experience the joys and pleasures of being a husband and wife. That's a very well said, I think you have you must have done this before? That's great. Now, how long have you been a marriage counselor for Well, I have been doing like, ad hoc counseling and working with couples for, I don't know. A couple decades already. I officially got my degree about 10 or 12 years ago and have been working professionally and it for the last 10 years, got it? Okay, perfect. So I know there's a lot of a lot, we could dive into. We're obviously not going to dive into everything as far as your personal experiences, you know, too.
Speaker 2
05:01
But let us jump into your backstory. I know recently I think within the last day or two, I read a Twitter thread that you had that you'd put out there about some Financial challenges that you had that you have experienced back in and your younger life. If you will let me count the ways. There are.
Speaker 1
05:22
So many.
Speaker 2
05:24
But even before that, I think, you know, I think we would be doing some good here to talk about kind of maybe. Um, college-going fair from there.
Speaker 1
05:33
Yeah, you know, I love the idea that your podcast is about entrepreneurial ship because for many of us who have that calling, it's not like something that you achieve once in life and then you like finish it. It's like sure, always evolving, you know, and I have evolved so many different times even as you know, even if you're in your own business, and let us just say you call your company the same thing, right? And it's your focus in the same Niche. It's constantly changing And you always have to reinvent yourself. You know, I had a customer that was my primary bread and butter for, you know, five years, I was coasting with this great Fortune 500 customer and then all of a sudden the, the primary buyer who is like my best friend there, you know, decides he wants to leave, you.
Speaker 2
06:20
Know.
Speaker 1
06:22
And you know that it, you know, all of a sudden I have got an office full of people, and we're just, you know, payroll and all these things and then boom, you know, you know, so you got to start It all over again or you gotta start picking up the pieces from where you left off. You got to call up all those customers that you ignored. Because you had a primary.
Speaker 2
06:39
No, absolutely no, you're absolutely right in it. You look entrepreneurship is not for everyone. And we make that very clear on this show, has a lot of perks for sure. But it certainly comes its with its own set of challenges and you got to be flexible and kind of figure some things out as you go along. So yeah, let us jump back.
Speaker 1
07:01
Yeah, it's interesting because it my journey is an entrepreneur is very connected with marriage many people today. Start with the mayor, you know what, their get, their finances in order first before they and men and women are doing this today. For a lot of people work for some people, perhaps foolish people like myself. I got married first with absolutely no idea of what I was. I was convinced that I was going to become a guitarist playing music in wedding bands and stuff like that. Just tell her. Sure. And what? Yeah, no, that's interesting because I am we don't have to spend too much time on it but I that whole car question of should I follow my passion a lot of younger people? Frankly think I should just follow my passion and then the money and happiness will flow from there and I will just rains down on me. And you know and my own personal opinion is yeah, you should certainly do something you enjoy. But at the end of the.
Speaker 2
08:01
A really you should follow where the opportunity is but, so I am curious to get your thoughts on that. We look back, you know the music thing didn't work out. What are your.
Speaker 1
08:11
Thoughts, isn't it? I, you know I was one of those people that are originally. I wanted to be a rabbi living in Israel and that I wanted to be a musician. And, you know, I was doing anything I could to avoid like Corporate America. I was a liberal Grinnell College Brad and Iowa and you know I just had, and I was like Sitting with suffering from Peter Pan syndrome, where I just didn't want to bite the bullet, you know? And eventually I got married. Thank God my wife and a lot of.
Speaker 2
08:39
Patience for me.
Speaker 1
08:40
But you know, as I told my son who's getting married recent soon, the second you get married, the clock is ticking. You know, there's only a certain amount of months I am going to go by and that in years the clock isn't taking years it ticks and weeks days weeks and months there's a certain amount of months you have before you got to get your act together. So at some point after trying all these Other options including music and multi-level marketing and all these things substitute teaching. I decided to go to computer school and this is back in the mid-90s and I went to a six-month coding course holding camp and got my first job. It was my first very first job was for twenty-four thousand dollars a year. And it was just a very funny experience, just that too. Because I was so nervous. I went into this place that was supposedly hiring. And I came and I brought my cover sheet and my resume and on the cover sheet, I only had my name and don't have any other information on there because my resume had all my contact information on it but I forgot to give them the actual resume. So I only gave him.
Speaker 2
09:49
Wow.
Speaker 1
09:51
And now back in, there were no cell phones or anything like that, right? It wasn't internet or think I walked into the place. So, anyway, I hadn't heard back from them surprise ever. So, two weeks later, I go back in and I just, you know, I wanted to do it in person. I know that sounds crazy today to go actually to an office up the stairs. Go to the front desk introduced.
Speaker 2
10:10
Ourselves, very aggressive.
Speaker 1
10:13
And the secretary looks at me, and she says, how are you David Feldman? And I said, yeah, she will. Stay right here, stay right here. So I was shocked, you know, and all of a sudden, the boss comes off in the back, and he says, we have been You to come back. We had no way to get in touch with.
Speaker 2
10:26
You. Wow. So if you know, he's like.
Speaker 1
10:29
That. Let us go to the back, and he's in, sit down. Can I get you a cup of coffee? Tell me about what you can do? I mean ahead he's already President.
Speaker 2
10:35
Right, right. He must have. Yeah, I have heard stories of people applying to college with. Just so, you know, with a one sentence application saying that station? Yeah, it's crazy.
Speaker 1
10:46
So I got my first job and like data analytics and I really hustled, you know, I really hustled because I had a family and the is nothing to get you. To move and motivate you more than having a wife with a baby on the way. And, you know, I really hustled and within the first, my first job was like, for 24,000 that I moved to another company making, like, 45. I went up to about 80,000 there and then after that, I have been working about four years, I realized I had reached a ceiling, you know, as an employee. I had reached a sling and there's nothing wrong, but I just, I was living in New York, even Back then and then in the late 90s, 80,000 wasn't going to get me a down payment for a house, and get my kids show, Jewish schools and kosher food, and all the things that we needed it, just wasn't going to happen.
Speaker 2
11:35
I mean, 80,000 then might be 200,000 now or 150 but it's New York. But.
Speaker 1
11:41
It's tell you exactly. Yeah. Then we're still four hundred thousand and you know, back at we're living and you know it just I needed a lot more. Sure. I have the opportunity to Become this computer consultant at Merck Pharmaceuticals. And this is when the internet was just taking off. So this is when they were all making their websites, and they were all like, oh my gosh, you have been here before. So let us show him something you looked at once before. Wow, that's like the coolest analogy, you know, and people were still eating mainframe computers, and they were looking for young programmers that could take them to that next level. And I took that opportunity it was really scary because it was like a six-month contract, and I was going to be making a hundred dollars an hour, which is basically the Run rate of two hundred thousand dollars a year, so he can boost salary for me. Yeah. It's a lot of money. Yeah, it was I mean I was totally unprepared for these checks that kept coming into my mailbox, and I was like, Pavlov's dog, every time the postman came out, would go run to the mailbox, open up a five thousand, eight thousand dollar check, whatever it was poison. Of.
Speaker 2
12:50
Money. Yeah.
Speaker 1
12:52
If I would have just invested all that in my sister.
Speaker 2
12:55
Right? Right.
Speaker 1
12:57
And yeah. So then I started my wants to get the taste of that life though. It's hard to go back, you.
Speaker 2
13:02
Know, sure. And I.
Speaker 1
13:04
Started doing business as an entrepreneur and it was scary because I had a goal from that back then. It really wasn't as scary because computer programmers were like in demand in demands. Yeah, I remember the but I chose to move from new Back to Chicago. I bought a house here first without even a job. And my dad said to me, like, how do you, how can you afford the mortgages? It don't worry. It's not a problem, you know, and I went into my next job here in Chicago, one of my next jobs here in Chicago. Is that Granger? It's an industrial supply company. Uh-huh, and I remember walking in there and again, I mean the building and the manager comes out, and he moves me to the office. And he says, do you know how to do this thing in computers? And I said, yes he goes. Do you know how to make these object-oriented code? Personified with this platform? I am like, yeah, I have done that before. He's like, do you know how to do this? He ask me for things, all of which I had actually done, you know, it's like okay stay here, don't move because I am back brings a contract, and he's like, okay, how much do you want per hour? Wow, and it is like that, goes through the days.
Speaker 2
14:16
Yeah. So and now this point you know, because the term entrepreneur gets thrown around a lot, especially nowadays. And but at this point, it's kind of you're an independent contractor and you're just, you know, correct me if I am wrong. Doesn't sound like you set up shop as an entrepreneur necessarily, but you it's a job, but you're a contractor and you're going, where the money is, is that what's your mindset? What's your approach to your career? At that point?
Speaker 1
14:45
Well, it's a bridge. You know, this is her Bridge because gone are the W-2s is the, you know, the stability, the long-term prospects, moving up to management, you know, all the right things, these are all gone. Sure as long as they need you, you're on a big payroll but the second they don't need you which is actually what happened to me. What actually happened to me is that we went through the.com.
Speaker 2
15:13
Era, And.
Speaker 1
15:16
You know, all of a sudden, you know, there were people from overseas that were flooding the market and so when I came to renew my contracts, and after a couple years there, the rates had gone way down for the same things anymore. You know and there is another interesting aspect of I think your audience would find interesting. There is like a there was a sense back then for me that you know, obviously we all understand the.
Speaker 2
15:44
Have trading.
Speaker 1
15:45
Time for money. Sure. And I was making all the as I explained to you as making all this money, but it was actually turned into for me at that age in my life, it turned into like this prison. Because my wife would say to me, well, let us take the kids on a week-long vacation to Disney Land. All right? All of a sudden that the calculator starts going in my.
Speaker 2
16:10
Head, right? Yeah.
Speaker 1
16:12
So it was lost. It was it wasn't even the price of Disneyland that I could have read my great Hotel. I was just I could take care of it was, how much money I would be losing by not showing up at the office, you know.
Speaker 2
16:28
I just, I could give it its a give us now that makes total sense. I am and as much as you're comfortable sharing approximately in that two-year period. If you had to say per year, how much you were making.
Speaker 1
16:39
Approximately? Yeah, and that two-year period when anywhere from about 250. See all the way to 375, depending on. And this is back in 2003, that's a lot.
Speaker 2
16:51
That's a lot of money. So that's a very high income. Yes.
Speaker 1
16:54
Well, and wasn't that complicated because I was getting myself a hundred, I was getting myself about 130 140, which is about 280, and then because I was an independent contractor, I brought in people for projects underneath me. So I was taking forty or fifty dollars an hour on their salary, and they were fine because they're still making 100. And I am making the other 30 or 40 share to you guys underneath me. Next thing. You know, every hour that goes by, I am yeah, 300 bucks an hour.
Speaker 2
17:23
Now. And it's easier for The Listener to say, well, of course, he could go on vacation, you know, because he was making all that money. It's like we had a, we had someone on the, on the show, Kevin Dahlstrom fantastic episode, he was making through a salary. I want to say 1.3 million per year and Quit his job and it I think it's easy to from the outside to look and say, well that's easier. Of course, it's easy to walk away because you make it, you had all this money, right? So think about, if you're getting paid, five hundred thousand dollars, you know in a month from now you think that's easy to walk away from. It's not easy at all over easy. It's not. So if you go to Disney for a week, your that's a lot of opportunity cost there. Yeah. So, but your golden handcuffs, essentially, you're tied, your trading, your time for money? Tied to that, to that job. I mean, even if it's not a W-2, you're still tied to that. So. So and you don't have the stability. That like you said before, there's no corporate ladder to climb, no real benefits per se, I would assume. So, so is this when you start thinking about making a change for?
Speaker 1
18:37
Career-wise? Yeah. Yeah. Actually it was, you know, it actually was. And what I chose to do is they started I started as a real, entrepreneurial say, a full entrepreneur. I should just.
Speaker 2
18:47
Here, I opened up my own.
Speaker 1
18:49
Small mobile development, mobile deployment, and development company. This is back with the Palm pilots and the blackberries, the Windows phones. And, you know, back in the day before the iPhone even came into existence. And I took all my internet skills and I created this beautiful website, where people can order phones online. I understand that today. It's like whoever you Bose store, The back then the idea of ordering a 700 dollar phone off the internet, you know, with the big.
Speaker 2
19:19
Deal Cheryl.
Speaker 1
19:21
And I had a like the developers out there, there were no shopify's or any of that stuff. I had to code my own shopping cart and like the whole session variables and database back ends and report. It was like a whole thing, you know? Yep. That was able to take all my skills and leverage that.
Speaker 2
19:38
And.
Speaker 1
19:40
And I did very well in that business on believe it took a couple years, so I never matched the same amount of money to be honest. I never walked away with like 350 per year, but I had my freedom because I didn't need to be at the off. I could still sell phones. Yeah, when I wasn't in the office, I.
Speaker 2
19:59
Love that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's awesome. Yeah. That's a key point for sure.
Speaker 1
20:04
Yeah. And I built up that business and this gets to the story that we were talking a little bit earlier about on Twitter and I we have we went to India. And I big Fortune 500 companies, including Microsoft and Nokia, and they were buying stuff for me, you know, Microsoft was buying Microsoft phones from.
Speaker 2
20:22
The, you know, that's why I am right.
Speaker 1
20:26
Right? It was great. It was just it happens. 80 phones here and these are expensive? Phones, no, 800 dollar phones. You know, each one boom, is again today, you go to the story, but back then, the average phone was 199, flip phone or Blackberry 349 for a Blackberry, you know, No. But, but I was selling these computer phones. These eighties HTC Windows phones, that were 800 bucks a piece, Microsoft Word order, 50, 60, 100 of them, you know, times were good. But unfortunately, what happened to me in my office was expanding and more it got health insurance for everybody, and it was like really rocking and rolling. Yeah, I know, it was really great. And, you know, unfortunately, I must have blinked too many times, and I didn't notice that one of my suppliers was catfishing me. Basically, he was supplying me. Phones at a really great price. Yeah, that were very difficult to get in the market and I done about six months with the business with him. And always paid him and within, you know, a week got a tracking number, within two, or three days to phones came. Exactly as advertised. You know, and I was making good money on these on this product. Because I was the only one that had it, you know? And then like he then he emails me like frantically one day after six months that he got this great new big order that's coming in and if I want I can take all whatever it was. 300.
Speaker 2
22:01
Phones.
Speaker 1
22:03
and I was like, okay, let us do it either. And there were no 300 phones and was no big to order that came in. I wired him the money, and he was gone and that was how much money? There were two transactions that I did. That's the totaled approximately 500,000 dollars well else. Even just saying that like ya know, and that's and I will be honest, it's you, I mean you're a therapist so you're not, I am not a therapist, but we do deal with this on the show where we you know, we do relive some painful moments and point is not to pour salt in the wound. The point is not to you know cause any.
Speaker 2
22:49
Emotional distress. But that, that is that man. I can't imagine what was going through your mind at that point.
Speaker 1
22:56
I mean, you know, it was like the exact same process as the grieving process and the first thing was.
Speaker 2
23:01
Like, denial, you know? I was like oh maybe I will .
Speaker 1
23:04
Get it back or maybe he's just out of town or maybe his phone doesn't work, right? You guys.
Speaker 2
23:09
So had his.
Speaker 1
23:10
Phone doesn't work, you know? And then days go by and there's no tracking number. There's no response to emails that Started up. And then the people, my office started getting involved. And then one of my office ladies looks up the skies name and it turns out that there was a news report about him that he was just indicted for like this major fraud. Wow, not with me, it was with somebody else. He actually stole. He only stole 500 for me, stole 10 million from another person.
Speaker 2
23:41
So you got indicted for that and it was.
Speaker 1
23:44
Like the grief that I experienced was I can You know, I can still go back there to this moment, you know, because as men it's like we put everything into our businesses. We just it's your identity, right? And a lot of ways. So your identity in, you're so like your soul hard Sweat & Tears. Yeah. Absolutely. You know your safety you know?
Speaker 2
24:13
Sure. And then all those things are every bit of your world is rocked in that regard. So for the listener and this is maybe not the easiest thing to do. But what could or should you have done differently all the time? Oh yeah. No.
Speaker 1
24:30
No. I do not. I do not claim like total victim here. I was not nearly as cautious as I needed to be. I was making so much so many deals and so much money and so much of that business was based on trust, sure enough today, even back then there wasn't the lookup tools and the stuff that we have today. Sure. You know, there's so much, everybody knew each other in that business and there were clear red flag. Eggs that you now. I would hope I would not fall for that at all. But there were clear red flags at the time that I just ignored and I wanted to ignore them. I want to take one of them because every time I wire this guy money he kept on giving me this great, these great products and nobody else could get, you know, and it's like I felt like, wow like what a window of opportunity that I have with him, and he was always available, just like, but like you if you want to know in particular That alone the fact that alone was happening that I was, you know, getting these products in this guy that alone was a red line. Well things are it's I hate to say the same old going to be true.
Speaker 2
25:45
Yeah.
Speaker 1
25:46
It's always the same thing with things that, you know, maybe I was too greedy, you know that I just didn't see, you know. Sure, I have toid, you know, of course, my gut reaction is not great. I had an office full of employees that needed to get paid, and I am turned little buddies. I wanted to Grow my business. I thought this was my window. You know, everybody's got that Shining Moment, you know, Bill Gates when IBM came and said to him, oh well let us can we license this or buy it? You know, he said license instead, is he being greedy, you know, he don't Microsoft, you know that right now. So I thought, you know, this was something that was going to really help me.
Speaker 2
26:21
Grow. Sure. Yeah, absolutely. No. It makes total sense. And him look, I don't make you money as a good thing in my opinion. Certainly anything like that can go too far obviously. But I am a capitalist. I mean I you know, I am an entrepreneur. It's making money is good and helping your employees is a good thing growing. Your business is a good thing. So.
Speaker 1
26:44
Yeah, those.
Speaker 2
26:46
There's I think this could have happened to any one of us. Yeah.
Speaker 1
26:50
yeah and other things like when I look for his address you know it wasn't like an established place. I mean, it was there, there was an office and a building but it wasn't. There were now that I look back like, now that I do business, — I still do a lot of business with large corporations in my phone business because I still have it on the side. Okay, that is because it was before. So it's not as much but now I only do business with like Fortune 500 large companies that I know.
Speaker 2
27:17
You know. I don't do this anymore. None of this stuff. I.
Speaker 1
27:20
Never just send off a wire to somebody who I met off the internet. Like that's does not. I guess when I say it like that, it sounds so stupid. That's what everybody was.
Speaker 2
27:30
Doing. Sure well and he produced before.
Speaker 1
27:33
On a.
Speaker 2
27:33
Lower level, right? Or what time. So he created that element of trust and yeah, and proof of concept, I guess you could say. So how did you rebound or rebuild? What happened? After that, that major loss? Yeah.
Speaker 1
27:48
For sure, for sure. As I say in my tweet, you know, the first thing I did is I lived on the couch for.
Speaker 2
27:52
About three weeks. I.
Speaker 1
27:53
Think, do not get off my living room couch. You couldn't kill me off with them with a peeler. I was just couldn't move, but it's, I decided. Added. I made some like major life choices at that point because, you know, being an entrepreneur, had takes a toll on your personal and it's very easy to get out of whack of family, and life, you know. Yeah, one thing I did which I am sure your audience is familiar with as I decided to read Tim Ferriss book, The 4-Hour workweek, you.
Speaker 2
28:22
Know? Sure absolutely.
Speaker 1
28:24
And I shifted like everything. I just decided I am going to put in my hours. I am going to continue going to work, but I am not. Then I am going to put boundaries around how much effort I put in because I mix I realized that no matter how much effort I put in, everything can be taken away in a snap of a finger.
Speaker 2
28:43
Here and there's always more effort to give. There's always more work to be done, right? It's.
Speaker 1
28:47
Never enough, right? Never is never not, you know. So I started to spend time with my kids in the morning. I started making them breakfast every single day. Instead of rushing off to work, I came home and had dinner with the family, which I haven't done in years till I took Entire Summers off and these were some of the best years of my life. I instead of being in the office I said, okay, I left it to the couple people that were there. My office. Unfortunately, had a fire a lot of people. I mean it's have real consequence. I do fire amongst you. Let go of a bunch of people was really sad for me. And we scaled down tremendously and I would I took Summers off. I just went up to the Catskills with my kids. I was my kids were at the age of going to camp. I decided I am going to Camp with my kids and I, again, this is all an entrepreneurial spirit. I called up the camp and I said to them. Do you guys have a boating program? Like a water skiing boating program? They're like, no, I am like, okay well I have got a good idea. How about if I come up to Camp with my wife? I will bring the boat. You put me up in one of the adult. You know, cabins and I will run the Boating program for the summer, and they're like, wow, that sounds great, you know. The thing is, I didn't have a boat, I haven't but I you know, I never done this before, so I drove up there. I had to get a little SUV because I didn't have nephews, I do have an SUV either. So adding something to tow the boat. I got a, I got an SUV. I drove up to the Catskills with before I went to the camp. I went shopping for a boat at the local marinas picked up the this five thousand dollar, 20-foot boat hooked it on to the back of my car and drove to the cap and acting like Yeah, I hear ya Captain David, you know? Yeah, that's.
Speaker 2
30:37
Great. I love it. Gets to the point of, you know, there's that fine line between, you know, fake it till you, make it versus having confidence that you can do something. And I think every entrepreneur kind of walks that line a little bit at some point. You know if you're not blatantly lying and saying no, I have been captaining boats for decades. Well, you know that's one thing but to say you could deliver the service, that's a different statement.
Speaker 1
31:01
And I did, I was, you know, My father had, we were raised on Lake Michigan here in Illinois, so I had done a lot of boating when I was a kid, I knew how to drive about it, just, you know, and I did like you said I didn't present myself as an official instructor, but I said I am willing to be that guy, you know, and write it turned out some credit, did it for the next, you know, four or five, maybe six summers in a row. It was wonderful times with my family and.
Speaker 2
31:25
I was running my business from a smartphone on the boat, you know. And.
Speaker 1
31:29
Then you know you do things that you know, the can make If this isn't why you go to become an entrepreneur, what's the point, you know? Like, you know, I want to learn life. I wanted to take it based on what had happened to me. I felt like I pressured to live my life now, you know?
Speaker 2
31:44
And that's yeah, that's a real good point. Yeah. So just not all constantly delaying and when I have this pile of money, finally, you know stockpiled, then I can start living my life and that at that point, your kids are 30 years old and oh.
Speaker 1
32:02
Yeah. You can't even, you can't even get on the pair of.
Speaker 2
32:04
Water skis at them, right, right? I love that. And for those who haven't aren't familiar with Tim Ferriss book, it's all about automating and delegating and using the resources not trading your time for money. Maybe that's hard about things. Yeah. And creating boundaries like you did. And so, so that's fantastic. So okay, so just for context at this point where you're doing the water ski instruction. What age are we talking about for you and how many kids did you have? What did your life look?
Speaker 1
32:41
I had five kids and it was let us say the years were about I think this is 2010 2008 2009 2010 got it okay and when I finished with all that stuff I came back and I decided that I wanted it does something different with my life again. So again do entrepreneurial is something that is just ever evolving blood. Yeah, sure. And I was kind of tired of, you know, dealing with, you know, technology and everything like that and I chose to focus on relationships and people and I always have a desire to and I know I would always have been White. I have always been working with couples and people and families and I decided to formalize it. So, I, there was a, there's a local University near my house. And that is that there were night classes. They said, you know, it back and get my Master's Degree, you know, and I started going and it wasn't easy because, you know, you gotta, you know, I am running a business. I am a father of six five and six kids, and I wanted to do this. And, so I signed up to become You know, very interesting hail which I have spoken about before, which is I think very inspiring for people, especially people later in life that are trying to make some serious decisions. Yeah, I think it was on 40, it goes on 42, or 43. And I, and I was contemplating this master's degree program and I just didn't know it's going to be. By the time I got my official certificate, where I could actually be license would be about five years. Between the classes of the internship and this and that. So I didn't I just was lost. I didn't know. I was this high five years or that's crazy, you know. So I turned to the wisest person, I know my father and I said to my dad and share with them. I opened up my heart and I said, really want to do this but I just five years it seems like yeah sure. Do you know I don't know if I have the strength so my father said something it didn't take you more than In two minutes, he said something very powerful to me. He said, is this something that you can do? Like you're going to turn your life upside down by doing this? Or is this something you can actually do? I say no if I poke is I myself do it's going to be a sacrifice. But yes, I can do it. Sure. And then he said, okay, is this something that you enjoy doing? And I said, yeah, actually I love the topics and look through the courses. They all seem really cool, the University's got great reviews. I met people who graduated this, and they love the program so excuses, you. So you would like this, so you can do it and you will enjoy it. And I said, yeah, it's has been. You only have one question to ask yourself when I said what's that? And he said, well, use you're telling me that you will be fully graduated by the time, you're 40, eight or so. And I said, yes, he says, well, the only question you have to ask Office. When you're 48, do you want to be somebody with a masters and license degree in family and marriage therapy? Or don't you, do you have to ask if you're going to be 40 or simple? Yeah, you gotta be 48. Anyway. Sure. Well who do you want to be when you're 48? Yeah, so imagine your life in 48 having this degree and imagine how you're going to feel at Fourth is you got it because you know this is old man's Wisdom, you know, he was right here. Two years old. So he's looking at her. He sees all of time, completely differently, you know? And it's like, you gotta hit 40. I was 48. You're going to hit 48. Who do you want to be when you're 48?
Speaker 2
36:36
Yeah, that's I love that. Yeah, I am actually working trying to get my daughter to provide us a two-year Vision right now. What's what does your life look like when you're 18? So and so, obviously you decided that you wanted. When you turn 48, you wanted to have the license and be certified and legitimate I guess if you will. And but so what? That is very Sage advice. I mean that's just whizzed. I don't you like you have to be older. It's a really this is really seen it. Sure, yeah. Well and I think a lot of times, you know, simple isn't necessarily easy. I am sure it was Easy to get that, right? That's degree it with all the other competing priorities in your life course but it was a sounds like it was a relatively simple.
Speaker 1
37:29
Decision. Yeah. Yeah. I just had to go and show up and do the work and it wasn't like I didn't have to move anywhere or quit my job or anything like that. I just needed to, you know? Grind sure. Yeah.
Speaker 2
37:42
So but what had I mean, you know what, it caused you to you said you were working with people before kind of informally or.
Speaker 1
37:49
Less just tired of it. Honestly I was just tired of, you know, doing computer work their computer work since I was 25 years old, and I was asked if I want to, I want Human Relationships. Yeah, I know.
Speaker 2
38:01
You know, I make sense. So I mean honestly when you say that it's really. So prior to this podcast, I was a co-host on a The Good Deeds noted investing podcast and it was, it was great. It was about investing in mortgage notes, which is my primary business. Now still, but I got a little tired of The mechanics of, you know, how to buy a node or doing due diligence on a, on an asset or doing a particular, deed-in-lieu of foreclosure something, it's all important stuff but the mechanics of it just weren't that didn't compare to the excitement that it was produced from the human stories that really were behind some of these successful people. We talked to whether Real Estate Investors or other entrepreneur. So that was the impetus for me for, starting this show. So I can, yeah, lately relate on some level. As far as just, it's the human side of things that are really is appealing. So, but now you mentioned briefly your entrepreneurial Journey takes, it sounds like it, maybe took a toll on your family, life or personal life was any of that a factor in you becoming a marriage counselor?
Speaker 1
39:18
I mean it was all related, you know, I kind of got into a little bit of hot water myself in my own marriage you know in part because of what was going on in my business, not my wife was very supportive during the loss but just in terms of where my priorities were you know so-and-so you know when we went to see a therapist I wasn't happy with that way and I looked at this lady.
Speaker 2
39:48
After spending a year in therapy, marriage therapy. They said to myself and me.
Speaker 1
39:53
May have even said this out loud. I was, so I am like I can do this way better than you.
Speaker 2
40:01
Yeah. I think a lot of businesses are created that way, a lot of entrepreneurs do their own thing because they did and in a lot of cases. It's true, right? I mean, not we're not trying to put her down.
Speaker 1
40:11
Personally it's not that is like you know, you and I have be talked about this earlier. We work together. I have a very one of the things that I decided, you know, again in an entrepreneurial way, was that I was going to approach marriage therapy, very differently.
Speaker 2
40:26
Yeah. Well, let us talk about that and because I do have will get to my rapid fire questions but let us talk about. So for the listener just to not full disclosure, but some disclosure, my wife, and I worked with David over a period of time last year in 2022 and it was, it was Very good and the result.
Speaker 1
40:52
Is always you wouldn't have been right?
Speaker 2
40:54
Exactly. So nothing but positive reviews and glowing remarks for from me on as far as your work goes David but yeah, it did surprise me in a lot of ways and you are unique in a lot of ways and which I think is a good thing. So talk to The Listener out there, How do you approach marriage that, you know, counseling and how do you approach your business as compared to maybe other therapists out there?
Speaker 1
41:22
So I mean, yeah for sure. So traditionally, every, but most of us are familiar with either therapy, or marriage therapy, which is colloquially known as talk therapy. And what happens is that usually, in many circumstances, the wife drags the husband in to see some sort of counselor in an office, and they both start opening up about what's wrong in the marriage and the counselor tries to figure out. ER out how to fix everything and that's all, it's all beautiful as everybody who's in The Help profession. It's all beautiful and God bless everybody. For sure, I am blessed therapist, or taking their time and putting their effort in and Bless the people who are there to try to make their marriages better. Yeah, I just don't think that Paradigm, that, that methodology works very well. It didn't work well for me because it ends up happening. Is what I say to my clients? When they questioned me about my method, I always say I meet with each. Person in the relationship separately. It's a bigger big part of my thing, and they say, why do you do that? And I say, there's no point in putting a hungry lion and an angry tiger in the same room and just to see what's going to happen, right? There's just no point. Sure that's oftentimes. What husbands and wives look like when they come into a therapist office and that's just one of the problems. The other problem is that people don't feel comfortable. I There's all these YouTube you know spoofy funny videos about the guy who thinks are. You sure? I should say how I really feel. You know I mean.
Speaker 2
42:54
yeah I am thinking of Will Ferrell and old school right now, but we will save that.
Speaker 1
43:02
Crazy stuff is crazy stories and it doesn't it's not safe. It's not an emotionally safe place, you know, but what I do that's a little different. Am I meet with the husband, I meet with the wife, we have parallel therapy going At the same time, but we're not fighting with each other at the same time? That's one thing I do it. Topeka makes it really safe. I kind of move into people's relationships, which is really nice. You know, I kind of we all connect and WhatsApp, we're all like a family group, and if something happens, I am a I am informed. The other thing that I think is really nice is that I have a, I have a curriculum. So I actually work with my clients, an actual concept, Types that are the foundations of marriage.
Speaker 2
43:47
Sure. So, you know, just, you know, basically.
Speaker 1
43:51
Positivity and gratitude communication, listening boundaries and intimacy basically sax and these five pillars are the foundation of its goodness. I like to say that marriage is more about what you do and how you feel. And if I can work with you and your wife or you and your husband, I am doing Be sick. They're not, they're not complicated, but they can be difficult at times as, you know, some basic actions and take it basic activities. You're going to definitely feel that massive increase in intimacy connection, trust communication, for sure.
Speaker 2
44:32
Yeah, no. It's a, of course, every relationship is different and I don't pretend to know everyone's challenges or anything like that but that's I mean what. What surprised me was how quickly we were able to make progress in certain areas, because you take such a practical approach because you take such an action oriented approach and these things initially may say is, I don't want to give away all your secret sauce, you know. But initially may seem trivial if I am being honest. Where it's like, what's that going to do? You know that, okay, great, getting her flowers on, You know, the appreciations right, we send just text messages or WhatsApp messages with well-written appreciation, messages, so okay, fine, I will do it, I dunno. But the reality is really goes a long way and I do remember not to get into our relationship too much. But I remember you using the analogy or metaphor of an archaeologist uncovering a City and really what the foundation and of all the structures is there. We just need to dust it off and so there's a lot that can be accomplished very quickly in your approach is what I would say. Oh yes they.
Speaker 1
45:59
Called my book. Yeah I know you my program is called re creating intimacy and I don't call it creating intimacy because if you're married, the interest is already there and that's why I always try this. I am a very marriage. Pods is another difference. I don't when you put a couple comes to Yeah, my job is to keep them married. I will, I do not entertain, you know if we're getting divorced and I don't know, that's not how it, you don't work, you may think that, but I.
Speaker 2
46:26
Don't think that's.
Speaker 1
46:27
Sure. And so, you know, my job is to help you recreate the intimacy. That's already there. You're already in love. There's a reason why she fell in love with you. She likes a dozen things about you and you like a dozen things about her, let us just bring that to the surface. It's where it belongs. And then you're going to see oftentimes, a lot of the problems that you came to me for. Don't even you can get confused as to why you ever before. I finally talked. So.
Speaker 2
46:54
Basically you walked work yourself out of a job. I don't like, that's exactly.
Speaker 1
46:58
Right. I have a line that says, when you feel like I ripped you off, I have done my job.
Speaker 2
47:04
That's hilarious. As funny. Yeah. One of the things that just came to mind, was something I learned in Psychology 101, 101 back in college, which shocked me at the time. Time. And I am curious to get your thoughts. I remember learning that know if you smile, you actually become happier. Now, this might sound either obvious or crazy, I don't know. But at the time it blew my mind because I always thought of A Smile as being a result of being happy, right? And so our response. Yes. And so but it could go, it can go both ways. And so if you smile, you actually change your emotion. So Curiouser. What do you think about that?
Speaker 1
47:46
I mean, you know again a lot of people say fake it till you make it right. Which sounds awesome. It's what you're saying you know, you put on that smile and then you will sometimes if I am on vacation with my kids and it's hot. We wrote driven past the place or the place we went to was supposed to be closed. So I say okay we're on vacation, I have been put on their happy face you know in the car and everyone has to start smiling, you know. And, so I think that applies again, I just want to point out subtle detail here. Sure. Our natural state with our spouse is smiling. We're not Faking It, the fake is when we don't smile. That's, that's the whole Crux my program. What you do when you come to me with pain, angst, bitterness resentment, disappointment heartache, that's the fake. That's the result of a few poor decisions, the stresses of life problems. With the kids, maybe your job isn't going so well, that's not how you really feel about. Why you love your life? You think you married her? You thought she was the knees bees. My point is to get you back into that frame of mind that which is the.
Speaker 2
48:53
Real frame of mind. Sure, I love that. That's awesome. And I love that you do have the structure because I definitely know of therapists out there who you know, six eight months in what book, we're just wandering. What are we doing here? I mean, I have a, I have a mortgage note mentorship program and quite honestly, it needs a Bit more structure because, you know, it generally works well for people and I do like that there's flexibility to both your program and mine because everyone's in a different spot and everyone has yeah, different need but the end of the day there's some foundational pieces and that structure, that template, that kind of works for everyone. And so yeah, you did we, you know, you do have that structured to kind of fall back on.
Speaker 1
49:41
Oh yeah. Which I if everyone is more positive towards their spouse, their more positive more grateful, if everyone learns, how to control the way they speak. So they're not blaming their spouse if you know how to listen so that your spouse actually feels like she's being heard if you understand how to set boundaries in your relationship without, you know, kick in the teeth in of your spouse about hurting their feelings, you know, how to respectfully set boundaries and receive boundaries. And if you have a framework around your sex life, your marriage is going to improve. I don't care who you are, your marriage is definitely going to improve. Mmm.
Speaker 2
50:13
So carries before I get to my mic what my rapid fire questions? Yeah, I did. You know? Because I didn't we hadn't done marriage counseling before, so I am not, and I am not an expert in how people Health different therapists approach. This Y is your approach controversial as far as the separate having most of the discussions separate. Why is that.
Speaker 1
50:35
Controversial? Well, you know it because its controversial in the sense that often times what marriage therapist I have considered there? Primary goal was to teach the couples how to solve problems. And the idea is that through them coming together in the therapy room with the aid of the therapist. They could then address their problems and learn how to work it out with the guidance. That the therapist there to help them take that skill and then bring it into their real lives as soon as they're finished with therapy. And so I, I respect that. You know, I definitely respect that and that is why in my program, we do have some joint sessions, you know, and joint sessions are opportunities through, you know, I don't allow any fighting and joint sessions, there's no finger-pointing blaming people come to the Joint session with the skills that they have already learned. And then I am they're facilitating what? I call real communication, you know, it may be the first time that your wife has ever been able to tell you that something that you said to her three years ago. Really hurt her, you know, and she may have said that to you before, but you're going to be defensive why? I only said that to you, because you said the same horrible, right? But, but through the skills that we learn in the program with me being there, she can feel like you hear her, and she can get some relief, you know? And then you guys can take that win-win experience and bring it into.
Speaker 2
52:07
Your as a lot of sense. Yeah. So did you start out working only in person? And then expand your business. Yeah. It's not.
Speaker 1
52:18
Relevant. It works in person. Today is not always most therapists work over the internet now.
Speaker 2
52:24
Sure. Was it a it was before covid, right? That you did.
Speaker 1
52:27
Yes. Yeah I started because I started out on Twitter, you know, I was originally doing in person here in Chicago and scope journal and then I started getting on Twitter and realizing, wow, there's a whole world out there outside of my little Community here and I really enjoyed And so that's where most of the action is. If anybody is interested in learning about My Philosophy, just my first name. Last name at David Feldman on Twitter is where all the fun is all the action. All the great conversations and there you can get to all my other, you know, social medias. But it's a great world out there a lot of, a lot of people around, looking for more.
Speaker 2
53:03
Yeah. Now I mean it's it is a, I am surprised still to be honest with you there's how this it's a crazy world. I mean, it's how this works. I mean, The fact that, you know, I never would have guessed that my wife and I would have had this Jewish therapist, you know, from that I found on Twitter because I was just following you on Twitter. I wasn't even looking for a therapist. I mean, yeah. And that's how I discovered you over. And over time I realized I really like this guy like following what he's you know. I like what? Yeah, like what you were saying and I liked your principles and, you know, so it's crazy in the thinking back, it's crazy. How this happens. Yeah but now you have got a good.
Speaker 1
53:48
But you know I think I have a decent sized following now and you know II like it because it feels like a family you know. I don't have hundreds of thousands of followers that I don't know it's like I may get a comment from somebody that has been following me for 45 years already. And it's like I know the person and it may have been a client of mine at some point in the past, you know. Sure. It's like a fan. We have got our own little family going on over there and people try it. Give their opinion. Ins and I both know you're not.
Speaker 2
54:15
And you don't shy away from expressing your opinions which I love you know. It's you have got I mean you know you're not wishy-washy about certain things so you're very principle of which I like as well. So yeah. Anything else that you want to add about your current business before we?
Speaker 1
54:32
Well I did come out with a great book. One of the things that I do is, you know, the tweets give me an opportunity to share a powerful concept, but there's usually, A lot more behind the tweet that can be developed and that's people when they have me in therapy, a lot of times, they will bring up something that they are. Saw me stay online or something like that. So I wrote a book.
Speaker 2
54:53
Called 52 tweets to a great marriage. And what I do is I.
Speaker 1
54:56
Took 52 of my most popular tweets. And I wrote like essays about each one like a Blog style essay but it's like a, you know, very well in depth explanation of the concept. So maybe it's about, you know, the role of feminine and masculine in a relationship or the role of the husband as provider, or maybe it's about the role of a woman and how she can guide her family or and or the relationship in between men and women and sex. You know, and I will say something in a hundred two hundred eighty Jurors on Twitter to 140 characters on Twitter but then in the book I will really expand upon that idea. And I do include Concepts that come from Jewish mysticism as well as other therapeutic sources and stories, you know, from my clients. So it's a fun read and it's broken down into 52 chapters. You could do one a week, you can learn it with your spouse and it's just a lot of intellectual thought and some deep meaning and some fun stories. So it's great. Yeah.
Speaker 2
55:56
That sounds a lot like how you approach your Business and your therapy as in general. It's very deep and well, thought out. But it also has a very practical element to it as well and your, your wife works with you, as well, a little bit. Is that right? Yeah, it's see the.
Speaker 1
56:13
Program that we have. One of the nicest, things about the program. Sorry, I forgot to mention, this is that my wife is works with the women. So when, you know if you come out as a couple, you get those sessions with me, but then the women get three separate sessions with my wife, who is a Mind Body Soul. Somatic healers. So she's really great working with women, especially for women who are emotionally stuck or have some trauma and that trauma could be from anything. It could be from a childhood wound. It could be from something that our parents happen at home or it could be quite honestly, from the form you, you know, it happens, you know, and she doesn't want to know, women working with other women, especially getting back in touch with her intuition their femininity. And kind of, you know, how they're feeling about things is very healing and.
Speaker 2
56:58
Helpful. For sure question. Yes, a lot of sense. All right, you ready for some rapid? Fire questions. Let us go. Let us go. All right, what do people misunderstand about you?
Speaker 1
57:11
People misunderstand that because I appear as a Hasidic Jew. They don't realize that for the first 25 years of my life. I was not, I was a regular secular person that grew up and went to public school and college. And so, even though I look like, you know, maybe I speak Yiddish and all these different things I can't read or write English. Actually, I am just like everybody else and I have had girlfriends when I was young and I understand marriage and relationships and so that is definitely something they misunderstand.
Speaker 2
57:42
It's the first time we have had that answer. It's great answer. What's one of your biggest failures or regrets in life?
Speaker 1
57:49
Oh, I wish that I had been more compassionate with my children, to be honest. Okay, I for some of my kids, I did some tough love and that worked out well for some of them and I wish it would have been more compassionate to the other one's got it. Understood.
Speaker 2
58:10
If you could go back and give your 18 year old self some advice, what would that be?
Speaker 1
58:15
Be more disciplined? Discipline is your friend?
Speaker 2
58:20
Yeah, so, so, what's I mean, that's in, this is, I know it's supposed to be rapid fire but what's an example of that.
Speaker 1
58:27
You know, get on the grind a little bit more, you know, I am a, I am a cerebral kind of floaty, type person, my head, and it's hard for me to take ideas that are up there and bring them down to reality. So, yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 2
58:41
Okay. If you could have coffee with any historical figure, who would it be?
Speaker 1
58:46
I would do. I would choose the lava to rub. That was my.
Speaker 2
58:49
Package will guide. Yeah. Okay. If you were given ten million dollars tomorrow, make up for that by four grand a loss. What would you do with it? No, not a business. It's just here's a check for 10 million. What would you do with?
Speaker 1
59:02
It? Well, I would help Mike right now, but we're trying to build a community out for, you know, for kids schools and stuff. My wife and I have a big push towards education, and we focus a lot on helping kids, you know, get a better education so that they today is, you know, you look around Public Schools, what's going on. So we would definitely spend some of that. I also was a volunteer teacher myself.
Speaker 2
59:23
So I love.
Speaker 1
59:25
The idea of helping children, you know, have a good relationship with learning and growing up in a safe environment. Love that back to your business. What is one challenge that you're facing in your business right now? I would say systematizing and expanding. So I kind of reached this balloon where it's kind of in a certain area and if I want to take it to the next step, as you know, it's if I am just a therapist, I have to put systems into place to really be able to spread my word to other terms. I can't do everything myself. So that's definitely an area where I am kind of bumping into right now.
Speaker 2
01:00:02
Got it. Maybe this relates in your opinion, what's 11? Of the most important personality traits that is needed to be successful in your industry.
Speaker 1
01:00:13
Integrity. Integrity is definitely one of them.
Speaker 2
01:00:16
Yeah. I love that. Yeah, perfect. How about a book, besides your own? Another book, you mentioned, a couple books. What's one more book that you could recommend they do too, or just 12 is.
Speaker 1
01:00:29
Perfect. Okay. So the two books that I always recommend to my clients, there're two kinds of books that are they kind of parallel each other, but they're the opposites. One's called No More Mr. Nice guy, by Robert Glover, I think and.
Speaker 2
01:00:42
I should have I need to now and that's.
Speaker 1
01:00:47
All about learning for men, learning how to set boundaries and learning, how to establish yourself and your what your needs are and how to express yourself in a confident way. And then the opposite book, which is equally as important is called The Way of the superior man by David deida and that actually focuses on, How to be a leader for others. So it's not so much about you. Stepping up for yourself. It's how to show leadership for your wife, your children community and family the way of the superior man. Those two books. If you love it both those. Yeah.
Speaker 2
01:01:21
Awesome. Great. Now with you this question is maybe very applicable if you could start another business tomorrow, what would it be?
Speaker 1
01:01:30
I did actually start another business and.
Speaker 2
01:01:32
Bye-bye.
Speaker 1
01:01:33
Yeah, it will be a fun one to talk about real quickly but About ten and five years ago. A good friend of mine introduced me to wines to all these different types of wine. And I started getting very passionate about red wine and like, where they come from and there's a lot of Israeli wines that are coming out now. And I said to my friend, you know, I want us to do something in this. So years went by, and we have this opportunity to become wine distributors. So we open up a line, the bution business here in Chicago awesome, and we have a branch now in Florida, and we're bringing in Tequila from Mexico, and we're doing, oh, wow! Yeah, that's a lot of He does most of the work I don't have time to do all of it but it's a lot of fun. No wonder my wife liked working with you.
Speaker 2
01:02:14
She likes red wine. So okay, we will have to say there you go. Financial abundance, what does it mean to you? What has it meant in your life? Sure. What.
Speaker 1
01:02:26
Does it mean to me? It means to me the ability to, you know, spend my time on creative and important, Pursuits that go beyond paying the bills. That's I bet that's the definition for me. What I really feel Financial abundance is really all about which I think is a little deep here. But why not is when I let go of my concern and Google kind of born from not having my limitation mentality, my limitation mindset. So for me, abundance isn't necessarily amount of money in the bank (although) than always helps for sure. But I have met, you know, just to be honest. As a therapist, I met people who have lots of Eroses in the bank and are still trapped in the mindset that they Penny pinch and so for me true abundance is when we can trust in God, and we can trust in our experience and life itself that you can let go of the bag lady syndrome as they call it and really learn to have confidence in our.
Speaker 2
01:03:29
Financial state law. That it's fantastic. What is one question that you wish I had asked that? I have not.
Speaker 1
01:03:36
Asked This is a good one since I met Mary Shepherd, what has been the role of your wife and helping you succeed in your career?
Speaker 2
01:03:44
David what has been the role of your life? Nothing uses the role of your wife and helping you succeed in your career. Yeah, it's a great question, great question and thank you. I came up with it all my own.
Speaker 1
01:03:56
You know, we're a team, you know, she was a stay at home mom for many years, and she's always been there for me. And when I say, been there for me, it's not just that she holds down the fort which she does, but she has always been somebody who I can talk to and lean on in hard times. That's not easy for women. Because Financial Security is one of their most the basest fears. And through all that my wife is always believed in me as always encouraged me as always, been there for me, as always help me get back up and has always given me the confidence to do what I always want to do. So, you know, that's been a wonderful thing. For.
Speaker 2
01:04:36
Me, that's great. Yeah, it's hard to put that in words, the importance of that, that's fantastic. Well, as we wrap up here, this has been fantastic. I feel like I got a free therapy session. So, so, certain really, really good. Where can our listeners find you online?
Speaker 1
01:04:55
Yeah, I mean, the easiest way, like I said before is a Twitter and if you want to see all the action, it's David. You will be ID Feldman. I am sure you will put the links.
Speaker 2
01:05:02
In the, in the, the up, the show notes.
Speaker 1
01:05:05
And then I have a great blog at David Feldman. Dot coms. I have a website wonderful website. It's got tons of Articles. A lot of what I do with my clients is actually they're available for people to get into and master classes blogs podcasts or starting. We do have some Tick Tock and YouTube and I said, yeah, you go to the website. You will .
Speaker 2
01:05:25
See everything, fantastic? Well, David, this has been really, really good. Thank you. James real been a real pleasure. Yeah, absolutely. So, thank you for spending your time with us. We appreciate it. Thank you. And to The Listener out there. We thank you for spending your most valuable resource with us and that is your time. Thanks everyone. Take care.
Speaker 1
01:05:48
Investors. Have you ever experienced challenging communication or the headache of tracking taxes and insurance meet by Phi a Loan Servicing Company founded by investors for investors with an expert team and best-in-class vendors by Phi will partner with you to service your loan from start to exit, visit by Phi, L s.com to see how you can get started today. That's bi fil s.com Mom, thank you for spending your most valuable resource with us your time. Mom, thank you for spending your most valuable resource with us your time. If you like the show, please share it with your friends and fellow podcast listeners, one entrepreneur to time. If you like the show, please share it with your friends and fellow podcast listeners, one entrepreneur to time. We can change the world. We can change the world. See you next time. See you next time.
